A U-turn is exactly what I need, a breakaway from the patterns and the habits I’ve been ensnared in for years. Much have happened and most of it I’m not proud or happy about. I’ve once again been slapped in the face by reality, a wake-up call from my immature and naïve way of thinking. I have never in 7 years had the courage to change my life into anything better. I have been too comfortable and lazy to do anything about it. It’s funny how much I’m willing to change, now that I have been pushed up against the wall, now that I actually and honestly have nothing positive left around me. The people, the surroundings, the energy and the love is all blurred into one big black ugly cloud and I cannot even state that the memories are worth fighting for. People failed me, people I really cherished and looked up to let me down. By not saying much at all, by not defending me and the bonds we share, they created despair and hatred in my heart and a little judgment. I’m happy the human-mind is blessed with psychological self-defense against unhappy memories and painful experiences or else how would we ever be able to move on and continue the pursuit of happiness.
I will move on, and I hope and pray that I never turn back and I hope that when feeling weak I will remember why I left and that the past is not worth my pain and misery. That I in fact deserve love and understanding,
So with a big FUCK YOU very much my dear friends, Farewell. :-)